First Time

I step into the school.
I look
at all the children
rushing by
heedless of me
going to wherever
whenever
paying no attention to my now
Where should I go?
My head swivels left
then right
but all I see is an endless wave
of children
and multicolored schoolbags
I look at my bag.
It is a pitiful grey
with no keychains to jangle cheerfully
I don't know what to do.
I look at the paper the headmistress gave me
a mess of Art and Science and English and Math
in neat little blocks
I don't know when's now
I can't tell if that's then
I feel like huddling up
in a little ball
and crying.
Sobbing like I haven't in years.
A tear drips onto the paper
blending History and Drama.
I feel a shadow.
Are they taunting me now?
Because of my five years of home schooling?
I look up- but it is only a girl
with hair hanging down in beautiful gold waves
"Hey?"
She asks me.
"You need some help?"
I nod, and hold up a hand.
She takes me to a classroom with her.
The teacher looks nice enough.
The desks look clean enough.
The kids kook friendly enough.
I sit down.

(Note: I am not home-schooled. In this, she is homeschooled only because there was no other reason to explain her confusion with school.)